A Mother's Love
by Sizzy lover4eva
Summary: a bunch of oneshots, featuring Katherine and Nadia. It describes their love for each other and all. CHAPTER 1: Describes the real reason why Katherine begged Damon to spare her life. Next chapter will be updated soon and will be based on the POV of Nadia upon meeting her mother. This series of oneshots follows the TV story line, so will be updated accordingly.
1. Don't want to die

My head spun, no this couldn't be happening...not now! Not when I just found...her.

Damon's hand pushed my head down towards the mouth of Silas. Him unmoving though I knew my fate if my neck touches his mouth...death. Death would be my fate. Every inch of my body shook with fear. I had been prepared to die at different stages of my life. This wasn't one if them. When the cure was shoved down my throat. When I was disowned...but not now, not now when I just found something important on my life...something worth fighting for.

I begged him over and over again, "I don't wanna die, please Damon." I cried over and over, for him to stop. I don't want to leave her, not now. I will never leave her again.

I felt helpless, but it was familiar. Since the day I became a human, I've felt this helplessness every single day. Being a weak, emotional creature depending on those around you. Suddenly I felt sharp pain in my neck, I knew this was it. I struggled, moving my hands around, screaming for help...hoping the goodness in Elena might surface and save me. Nothing. No one said a word as I felt my world being drained away from me.

Darkness hugged me like a blanket, every moment in my life flashed before me. Like a whirlpool I'm sucked in, memories surrounded me like a beast trying to swallow me alive. Pictures of my life flashed in front of me. The end one was her. Nadia. Her as a Baby then her now. My mind spun back to that day when I found out who she was. The moment where I felt my life may just be complete.

_"I'm Nadia Petrova and you are my mother." Nadia said her eyes teary, staring into mine. I can remember vividly the feeling of my feet going weak, my heart sinking to the pit of my stomach and the feeling that I haven't felt in centuries the feeling of ...joy. I can't believe it, my daughter was sitting I front of me? My daughter, Nadia. Even after 500 years I could still remember her face as a baby, perfect, her eyes the exact shade of mine, her face like her father's. I remember how desperate I was to hold her yet she was stripped away from me. Before I knew it I realized she had fainted. It struck me that I stuck a wood stack right in her heart and twisted it whilst I questioned her._

_I grabbed hold of her and carried her bridal style. This felt weird, the weird senses of responsibility and love were so unfamiliar to me. I watched her silently as I walked down the empty streets. The dim street lights shone on her face, though it didn't quite define her facial features I couldn't tear my eyes away for her face. I cannot believe my own daughter was still alive. I can't believe even after 500 years, I could feel the sense of love I felt, when I saw her in my mother's arms. Right now, even though she was hundreds of years old, for some mysterious reason I felt like I was just holding my baby girl. The one that was stripped away from me, the reason why I'm like what I am today._

_Years of running made me forget the feeling of having hot tears waiting to burst out. Right now I can feel them edging to pour out. I held onto Nadia tighter, afraid and suspicious of anyone around me._

_**Day after the confession**_

_I stood by the window in our hotel room. The sky was grey and stirring. I could hear the soft drops of rain splattering on the window pane. Then I heard a rustle behind me. Closing my eyes I sucked in a breath and turned around. Pushing a strand of my hair behind my ears I held onto the mug tightly. The warmth that radiated off the mug, reminded me this was reality and that she was actually in bed. Hours ago I had gently pulled out the wooden stake that pierced through Nadia's heart. I cut opened my wrist and let my crimson blood drip into her mouth, giving her energy. Now she was awake. I approached her, cautious of the sound of my movements. I took my seat on the bed directly opposite her, and toyed with my mug. I told her I searched for her when she was 8 yet I couldn't or didn't find her after searching through all he cottages and villages. I saw her mouth twitch, her eyes narrowed on me though I knew she trusted me...after all we were mother and daughter._

_Te timely I reached forward and gave her the mug, "I''m Katherina Petrova and it's nice to meet you...finally," I gave her a hug, hoping I wasn't pushing it. Despite my worries she urged my back tight and sobbed on my shoulder._

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	2. Never love or hate?

I watched as two figures emerged from the doorway. The guy I knew for sure it was Damon. The woman on the other hand I wasn't so sure. I looked at her face in the shadows, where I was concealed. Her features were exactly the same as Katherine's, no wrinkle, dimple anything that could be used to tell them apart. I watched as the two talked to the bartender, and saw the signal. Damon drank that cup. I instantly got out of the shadow and smirked at the two. The girl questioned me but I had no time to listen to her, all I knew was I saw that door crack open again. This time came a woman that looked identical to the girl talking to me right now. My heart pumped quickly, it's beats increasing. I tried to sound straight, inside I was burning with anticipation. 500 years of tracking, this was the moment where I finally get to see my mother. I silently chuckled at the word Mother. I finally get to see my so called mother who left me right when I was born and never attempted to find me. The one who killed her self so she could be a vampire, forgetting all about her daughter...me. I never thought looking at someone could involve so many emotions. I asked them who was Katherine and immediately the one that arrived later pointed at the girl directly infront of me. I knew instantly she was Katherine Pierce...no Katerina Petrova...my mother.

The realization hit me, she was it, she was my mother. She looked at me with those set of challenging brown eyes, the expression of fear and angry, her brown wavy hair still messy. My mother, my mother. Taking a step forward I said I needed Katherine alive and immediately I felt a body pressed against mine, and a voice telling Katherine to leave. she can't leave! Not now, I can't let her leave. Anger soar through my body, it felt like every single vein was bulging and exploding, I remember had been a vampire so much longer than her. Smirking I pushed her off easily and attack her. Just as I was about to snap her neck I remember who was the one that mattered most, so instead I ran out of the café after my mother.

As I ran into the forest, my mind was spinning with thoughts. I needed to find her. I will not let her leave me alone...again. Never. I knew I could catch up, after all I am a vampire. Picking up my pace, I barely see anything as my inhumane speed took me towards where the strong smell of blood laid. I don't know what I felt when I saw my mum, was it a sense of joy? Or was it a sense of hatred. The hatred that I never got to love my mum like I wanted to, never got to see her when I wanted. The hurt...? The way I imagined my mother, a prefect beautiful lady, wise yet loving and every time she saw me she would hug or even kiss my forehead. All the tales about my mother made me feel sick, though sometimes I couldn't help but agree with them. People spitting my mother's name, her compulsiveness, the way she manipulates people, her slyness. I know though for a fact that I agree fully with the statement that despite people said she was all those things she was very wise. Wise enough to have never been caught by Kluas, intelligent enough to have escaped death so many time.

Infront of me I could see a figure clearly, I can hear her heart pumping furiously trying to make her humane limbs move faster. I could smell her, both her fear and her blood. As I reached her, I wanted to tell her right there right now that she was my mother...but I knew the time hadn't come yet, I was gonna test her, make her suffer so she could feel the pain I went through. Though I had millions of way to to true her, the moment I saw her face turn and look at me in my eyes, I couldn't help but soften. Maybe this was my fate...I could never truly hate her. Never.


	3. Death was merciful

I watched as she brushed past me, I stared into Stefan's eyes, for a Moment i felt sick...not physically, but mentally. I made sure stefan was alright before running into the bathroom. I took out my purse, where I kept a pen and a piece of paper...I don't even know why I keep these but I do, maybe cause I am an ancient person. I let a soft chuckle, not a happy one, but instead a sad low chuckle. One that was the sound of hurt, the sound of hatred. Hatred for the world, for the things that happened to me, for my destiny but most of all me. I never realized how much I hated myself, until then, until my own daughter gave me a look of hate. That look from anyone would've meant nothing...but from my daughter, one who forgave me of everything until then was painful. It felt like a dagger made of wood was stuck in my chest, twisted and punched through me even deeper.

I looked up at the mirror, my face was pale, stained with tears...I looked like a mess. I touched my face, what if I wasn't a doppelgänger? Would I have had another life? Why was my life ruined because of this stupid face I have? I thought about Nadia's face again, so beautiful, so like me, yet so like herself, individual unique, no two face alike...unlike mine. She was a beautiful girl and maybe like all mums I see the best out of her, to me she was just the most beautiful being I've met. I meant what I said to Matt, when I said she was incredibly beautiful, because she was.

Tearing my eyes, from the mirror, I placed the paper on the table. My fingers brushed against the hard marble surface. The cold, hard marble surface, just like my life. A cold, hard life. A life not made for humans to live or any supernatural being. From the moment I was born, born to a traveller, born with this face, my life was doomed. I had no way to escape, no way to run despite running for 500years, I never truly escaped. This was because the true enemy trying to get me killed was not only time...but myself. I cannot live another day like this, my life was nothing but trash, nothing to look forward to. Instead all it has was the bad memories of my past, of the darkest parts of my soul.

My hands started to shake as I placed the pen onto the piece of parchment. I wrote in cursive writing the way I was thought during the 15th century, unlike they write now. Personally I think those writing told more about you as a person. As I wrote each word, my eyes couldn't help but tear up. Every word was full of emotion, this letter was directed to my daughter, I have nothing left anyways, nothing until I found her. I lost Elijah, lost stefan, mum, my whole family now I've lost her. As i finished I walked out of the empty bathroom. I spotted the bill that Nadia offered to pay. I slid the note into the bill pocket and walked off.

My humane legs dragged me slowly towards the high elegant clock building. I could hear the faint tick tock of the clock, as if reminding me my life was slowly drifting out of side, out of my grasp. I didn't care anymore, now I had nothing, my life meant nothing. Searching my way through the darkness I found the door, that led to the top. The spiral staircase, cliché yet I couldn't help but smile. Even after so many years, something's don't change. Somethings were always better without the alterations.

My steps were faint, slow. As I looked up I could see the starry night, tonight would be the end of Katerina Petrova. The girl who had nothing, the girl who died because she chose to, not because she was forced to. Before long I reached the top. The harsh wind blew against my frame, chilling my bone to the core. My curls went flying, I pulled my jacket closer, securing the warmth. I smirked, this was it, this was the day I feared yet now I couldn't help but to be happy. I closed my eyes, I could feel the wind growing stronger, my body almost swaying along with the wind. I took one step closer to the ledge, but was blown back by the wind, also by my doubts. My doubts about dying...what if I could spend a life with my daughter. What if I oxoxox make up to her, build a relationship? What if she still wanted me, needed me? I sighed...so many what ifs so many doubts, so many insecurities. This wasn't the end, not until my breath stopped, not until my heart stop not until every inch of my body grew weak and rested in eternity. My death might mean happiness for my daughter, for her to be finally free from the haunting and daunting memories of her terrible mum. When I die, maybe then she wouldn't have to suffer, thinking I abandoned her once again, maybe she didn't have to know how much I loved her, she doesn't have to love through days of thinking the possibilities. If I die, all my pain all my sufferings would end. My fear of death was nothing but child's play, death was merciful to die, would mean...release. Release from this cruel world. From the world that stripped everything I ever loved or cared about from me. I closed my eyes, once again. One single tear rolled down my face, "Goodbye Katerina." I murmured to myself and I spun around and fell backwards. Bye my Nadia. _My beautiful Nadia, I loved you more than you will ever find out._


End file.
